When you first start dating, everything is new and exciting. Just receiving a message such as "morning babe" is enough to send your hormones racing and to fuel that “lovey dovey” feeling you both have for each other. Life feels great, passion is at the forefront and you just can’t keep your hands off each other.

As your romance progresses over time things can get a little more static and you may not feel that love fire burning as strongly as it used to. You still love your partner but it’s just not the same.

Throw in a little work, money or family stress and you might find yourself wondering if you’re just going through a bad patch or if this is actually over!

Don’t throw in the towel just yet! It’s normal for couples to have ups and downs. So, if you often find yourself wondering how to bring back that spark in your relationship - Here are a few tips you can try to pull you back into that initial honeymoon phase.

Get out of that rut

Man with yellow t-shirt and white trousers and woman with white top, black trousers and a brown bag taking a walk in a park.

Let's set the scene, it’s been a long day and you’re both tired. You eat dinner, curl up on the sofa to watch your latest shows then roll into bed at around 10, or even 11ish if you’re feeling adventurous. Now, there’s nothing wrong with feeling comfortable with your partner, but you don’t want it to lead to complacency.

Get out of that rut by trying something new and fun together! Go dancing, eat at a different restaurant, hire a boat or try rock climbing…whatever it is just make sure it's something you can both enjoy together. Bonding over a new activity is exactly the way to bring back excitement in your relationship and help you reconnect.

Make date night a priority

Man and woman with filled red wine glasses in their hands sitting on a couch talking, behind a white coffee table.

Over time, it’s inevitable that other parts of your life will need to take priority, whether it’s raising kids, getting that new family home or working extra hours for that all important work goal. It can sometimes feel difficult to balance everything in your life evenly, but neglecting your love life can make you both feel devalued and underappreciated.

Schedule some time for a date night either weekly or monthly and stick to it! Committing to the date reminds your partner how much they mean to you, so drop the kids off at grandmas, get your glad rags on and go enjoy each other's company.

Let’s get flirty!

Don’t feel embarrassed about getting a little naughty with your partner. The occasional flirty text can add a little spice to what might otherwise be a mundane day. A great way to ignite desire between you and your partner is to tell them exactly what you would like to do to them after they get home from work.

If this isn’t your thing, you can always send a few compliments or words of love instead. Be sure to tell her how good that dress looks on her or how good he smells with that new aftershave. By doing so you’re sure to make them feel good. Whether you choose to go full on with your messages or be a little more subtle, getting frisky with your partner lets them know they’re always on your mind.

Intimacy matters

Brunette woman with a white top, in a brunette man's embrace in a brown top, smiling with their eyes closed.

We can’t forget to mention the importance of intimacy for couples who wish to reignite that spark, but being intimate with your partner doesn’t necessarily mean getting it on in the bedroom.

The simple act of physical touch in your everyday activities can be just as important. Cuddle next to each other when you’re laying down watching a film, hold hands when walking together, gently squeeze your partner's arm as they walk by you or offer to give them a sensual massage.

This type of affectionate intimacy will help to strengthen the bond you both share and show how much you still desire each other physically.

Have fun in the bedroom

Man and woman lying under the sheets of a bed with multiple pieces of clothing thrown on the ground around them.

After 5+ years together it’s easy to fall into the same routine when it comes to bedroom antics. Shaking things up in the bedroom can help reignite the sparks of passion once more. Talk to your partner about each other's hidden desires and see if you’d like to try them out for yourselves.

When you’re experimenting with new things in the bedroom it’s important that you both communicate with each other and respect each other's feelings. Remember it’s ok if you decide that particular move isn’t really doing it for you. What’s important here is that you listen to each other and enjoy yourselves!

Get off the phone

It’s 2021 and everybody and their nan pretty much has a smart phone these days. You can literally run your whole life on your phone which is a great convenience but what happens when the phone begins to run you?

Snubbing your partner for your phone, a term known as “phubbing” can put a strain on a long term couple. Yes I know that viral cat video your best mate tagged you in is pretty funny but you don’t need to watch it during date night.

Ignoring your partner is a huge turn off! Put your phone away and spend some quality time by talking to them, playing games or actually watching that film they’ve been dying to see! By giving your partner your complete attention shows them how much they mean to you!

The takeaway

However, if you go and try some of these tips you’ll be amazed by how your partner responds.

It’s amazing what a little love, affection and attention can do once more.

There’s no fool proof easy fixes to get the spark back in your relationship. It takes time and effort to reignite the flames of love and even more time if you're trying to fix a broken relationship. However, with patience and time, you will be able to build trust and deeply connect with your partner once more.